The New Year has brought happiness for many with engagements and the anticipation of the arrival of a new bundle of joy; however, with just as many engagements and weddings that 2014 is bringing, there have been just as many, if not more break-ups. There are those who are constantly trying to find a stable relationship. So why is it that some people seem to be playing musical chairs when it comes to finding true love, and finding the one that they are supposed to be with?
There are several reasons why relationships fail. Besides settling for just anything for the sake of being in one, the individuals who do take their time will meet the perfect one, but the timing will be off or there just was not a MUTUAL understanding in the union. Just as it takes work to build the friendship and companionship, it takes just as much work if not more to make it last.
So let’s review a few of the main reasons why people break-up.
No mutual understanding.
This is big because relationships have to be 50-50. Both parties have to be making an effort into making something work. Yes, it is all about becoming friends, best friends at that, but friendships take work as well. And developing a friendship with someone that you possibly want to be with is different than building and becoming friends with someone who you meet and share interests with (i.e. a best friend of the same sex from grade or high school. That type of friendship is completely different).
When you’re dating and developing a friendship with a potential boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife, communication is important when it comes to getting to know each other on a deeper level and having fun with each other. Yes, some may not be that big of a “phone person”, but this is when both parties need to come up with an agreement of how to effectively communicate to where progress is still being made. Communication must be there for a naturally and progressively friendship and relationship to begin and flourish.
From experience this is when the two individuals become very busy within their professional lives to the point where they seem to lose balance; however, in a relationship you always make time for each other no matter what. Even if it’s just a five minute phone call or a quick meet up to embrace in a hug, kiss and small talk—it all matters. When one party starts making up excuses, such as they are too tired to do something or talk on the phone, this is where the communication starts slipping and soon after, the bond will eventually tumble as well.
When the phone and Skype calls become texting to where the two of you start arguing in a text message, this causes mis-communication issues which ultimately ruins everything!
Yes being in love and being loved back is awesome; however, too many people are involved with the wrong person. You think that you want to marry this person, but later down the line you find out that they are not for you, and you chose to ignore the red flags that you seen in the beginning. The reason why most do this is because they settle. They see those around them in relationships and they too want to be in one, so he or she hops into something with the first person that they come in contact with instead of dating and getting to know more than one person as friends first to see who is the right fit.
No established friendship.
If you are not friends with your significant other, sorry to say that relationship will not last. Sorry to be so blunt, but it’s the truth and the truth hurts. There MUST be an established friendship before there can be a successful companionship which leads to marriage down the line. As the two of you are taking things slow and getting to know one another, a friendship starts to develop. You have fun with the other person and realize that you can be a complete fool around each other and its okay. It’s the absolute best thing when the love of your life is also your best friend. You are able to tell each other everything without being judged. When couples feel as if they cannot tell each other everything and think that they are going to be judged, number 1 they are not for each other and number 2 they are not friends.