Learning to Value Each Other Over a Relationship ‘Title’

The title alone in this article may alert many women. One because most women want and “need” the title when dating. They want it so much that they’ll start to put a timeline on when the man that they have been dating should step up and ‘commit‘ to her. But here’s the thing, love, real love, takes time. And when the connection is real, it’s just the real so hence, the bond that two people share isn’t defined by a title, but you just know that the two of you are exclusive through actions.

Sometimes wanting and needing a title can complicate things and overall, ruin that bond. Ladies, if a guy is showing you that action, that affection and that love, he wants to be with you and he is already yours. However, when you continue to fret him about a title you are telling him that you value the title of a relationship more than you value him. Learning this comes with patience and growth.

The man that I am dating is definitely unique in his own way, but also like many men out there. Our bond that we share is indescribable but unbreakable. Over time, we have grown a lot! Our connection was instant from day one, but the growth came from little conversations that we had in between which prompted our understanding of one another and has helped as to value and appreciate the person more than the relationship.

Men can appreciate the woman that they are dating more naturally than women. As women, we tend to go into a situation wanting a commitment or wanting marriage more than actually wanting and valuing the man. Women will also tend to live in a fairy tale and wanting the man to do x, y, and z, rather than really valuing and getting to know the essence of the man.

A true and long-lasting relationship is one where the value is not placed on the “thing” (relationship) but rather the people in it. The two people just love being around each other and they love getting to know what the other person likes, doesn’t like, etc. When out and about, it’s not about where the two people are but rather about the experience that they get to share together. It could be as simple as going to the movies. Yeah you could’ve seen that movie alone or with your buddies or even with a friend of the opposite sex, but seeing it with that special person, was just the icing on the cake. Sometimes, most of the time, you’ll even forget to take a picture together for memories while out because you are just enjoying that moment with that person.

So ladies, please try for now on out, to see the value and essence in the man that you are dating/seeing. If you just can’t see the value in him either one he’s not the one for you or two, the problem may just be you and you have to reevaluate what is important to you in a relationship and/or bond with someone. Just know that when things are right, they just flow naturally and that as things continue to grow, certain things also take time. You cannot, and I repeat, you cannot listen to these other women on social media who say, “Girl, if he a’int committing to you or asking you to be his wife in 6 months to a year, then believe that he a’int that into you and doesn’t want to be with you.”

In the end, only you know your man. If he is showing ACTION then he is showing you where you stand in his life. Talk is cheap. A man can from day 1, claim that a he is going to marry you and then 3 months down the line, his true colors can show and you are back on that dating site or back to fishing.

ABOUT AUTHOR

  • Naomi K. Bonman

    Naomi K. Bonman is a graduate of Clark Atlanta University where she holds her Bachelors of Arts in Mass Media Arts with a concentration in Journalism. She also holds her Masters of Public Administration. She is the Founder and CEO of Awakened Media Enterprises, Inc. which owns Purposely Awakened. She has been in the media field since 2006 covering beats that range from social justice, community, entertainment, sports, fashion/beauty, and culture news.

Naomi K. Bonman

Naomi K. Bonman is a graduate of Clark Atlanta University where she holds her Bachelors of Arts in Mass Media Arts with a concentration in Journalism. She also holds her Masters of Public Administration. She is the Founder and CEO of Awakened Media Enterprises, Inc. which owns Purposely Awakened. She has been in the media field since 2006 covering beats that range from social justice, community, entertainment, sports, fashion/beauty, and culture news.

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